The Mathematician

A professor of mathematics sent a fax to his wife. It read: "Dear Wife: You must realize that you are 54 years old, and I have certain needs which you are no longer able to satisfy. I am otherwise happy with you as a wife, and I sincerely hope you will not be hurt or offended to learn that by the time you receive this letter, I will be at the Grand Hotel with my 18-year-old teaching assistant. I'll be home before midnight. Your Husband"

When he arrived at the hotel, there was a faxed letter waiting for him that read as follows: "Dear Husband: You, too, are 54 years old, and by the time you receive this letter, I will be at the Breakwater Hotel with the 18-year-old pool boy. Being the brilliant mathematician that you are, you can easily appreciate the fact that 18 goes into 54 a lot more times than 54 goes into 18. Don't wait up."

Mathematics

Source of this part is Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia. The text is licensed under the GFDL.

Mathematics is often defined as the study of certain topics, such as quantity, structure, space, and change. Another view, held by many mathematicians, is that mathematics is the body of knowledge justified by deductive reasoning, starting from axioms and definitions.

Practical mathematics, in nearly every society, is used for such purposes as accounting, measuring land, or predicting astronomical events. Mathematical discovery or research often involves discovering and cataloging patterns, without regard for application. The remarkable fact that the 'purest' mathematics often turns out to have practical applications is what Eugene Wigner has called "the unreasonable effectiveness of mathematics." Today, the natural sciences, engineering, economics, and medicine depend heavily on new mathematical discoveries.

The word "mathematics" comes from the Greek µ???µa (máthema) meaning "science, knowledge, or learning" and µa??µat???? (mathematikós) meaning "fond of learning". It is often abbreviated maths in Commonwealth English and math in American English.